Current mood:	melancholy
Current music:	i wish i was the moon tonight//neko case

waxing and waning
i watched the lunar eclipse tonight, by myself.
naked in my bed, i took a moonbath, and held my breath as the moon bled a lovely garnet red. i felt full, pregnant with the ghostly orb, though my stomach lately has been flat as the praries. when i wasn't looking, i seem to have lost twenty pounds. strange concept, losing some of yourself.

who will find me?

not him. the urge to capitalize the h in the word "him" must be curbed. lately when i talk to him, i have conversational premonition- knowing precisely what he'll say before he says it. the sensation of listening to a cd you know well, and when one song ends, your mind cues up the opening bars of the next song automatically. unfortunately, they're never the words i want him to say.

i have words on reserve for him, in case decides to pluck me from the sad anonimity of single girls who can't even give their love away. he could be the one person to have complete access to the tangled synapses and neurons firing, he could have any thought of mine he desired. but, if he was so lucky, perhaps i'd let other things do the talking. the dangerous symmetry of the sloping curves of my collarbone is worth a thousand words. or it should be, to him.

but tonight, tonight the only man for me, is the one in the moon. and i decide i love him, craters and all.