Current mood:	sick
Current music:	there there//radiohead

i am my own favorite topic of conversation. deal with it.
(interview questions courtesy of davidjmcgee )

1.) You just returned from a semester in Dublin. Which is the better city, Dublin or New York? USA or Ireland? Budweiser or Guinness? Compare and contrast.

what you must understand about dublin is that it is a "city" by european standards. almost all of the things you mentioned about nyc's majesty in your interview are virtually non-existent in dublin. particularly the food delivery service and the subway system, two things that have a direct impact on the level of energy i must exert, and if you know me, you know i like to keep that at a bare minimum.

however, dublin isn't all bad. firstly, the level of intoxication of cute irish guys is generally such that i don't need to lower my standards to get some action, and cute guys will actually do the pursuing as long as those proverbial beer goggles are on. speaking of intoxication, you can spit in any direction and hit a pub, which is a little slice of heaven for a lush like myself. the beer is legendary, and something to be taken seriously. my liver already misses carlsberg, kilkenny, smithwick's, and guinness. on the continuing subject of vice, smoking is allowed just about everywhere, and while that's not so great for the scent of my clothes, it's quite refreshing when compared to the 1984-like stance nyc has adopted on smoking since i've been gone. people are friendlier (at least to your face), and even though i was there during the war, the derogatory comments about americans and the states as a whole were fairly minimal, considering.

to conclude: would i live in dublin permanently? "probably not". would i go back for another visit? "where are the plane tickets"?

2.) On May 28th you wrote "i am taking an extended hiatus from livejournal." Since that time you have posted only once. In the past, you posted quite frequently. Why have you chosen to take a break from livejournal?

a comment was made to me recently about the state of my writing. the comment to me, sounded bitingly critical (though the person who made the comment insists that it was not meant as such, or at least it wasn't meant the way i was taking it). i was quite hurt, to say the least. for the most part, i can handle criticism if i feel it's constructive, or if i feel like i can improve. what's frustrating about my writing is that i don't really have an objective view of it yet, and the comment then sounded like not only an attack on my writing, but also me as a person. if i thought it was completely untrue or unwarranted, i would have brushed it off. however, the comment touched upon some of my emotional issues, and beliefs i hold about my own inadequacy and failures, both as a person and an "artist".

the thing i've come to realize though, is that running away is my first defense mechanism, and denial is hereditary. but, i'm looking to break myself of this habit, so, i don't quite think that my hiatus will be as long as i anticipated.

3.) M. Night Shyamalan let us know that Bucks County is (or has been) infested with aliens. As a Bucks County native, have you ever come in contact with an alien? (bonus subquestion: in the film Signs, Bucks County is home to a tiny hick bookstore that keeps a book about aliens around "for the city folk." Yet you claim to have worked at Barnes & Noble. Explain yourself.)

while i am personally not convinced one way or the other as to the existence of extraterrestrials, if aliens really did exist and are roaming around the bucks county area, it would retrospectively explain a great deal about some of my high school classmates and teachers.

as for barnes & noble, or related trappings of civilization in bucks county, i'd refer you to my post about a little establishment i'm sure you're familiar with,
starbucks .



4.) This is such a great question that I'm taking it from my interview and passing it to you. You are given a gun and 100 untraceable rounds of ammunition. Anything you do, you will get away with. Choose your own adventure:

honestly, i'd probably destroy the gun and the ammo. while there are many people that i'm sure at one point or another have received uniquely sadistic deaths in my over-active and particularly vengeful imagination, i can't think of a single person i'd leap at the chance to pump full of lead in reality. the "anything you do, you will get away with" isn't particularly enticing, simply because it's not law enforcement that prevents me from being a homicidal little gal, it's those pesky things called "morality" and "conscience". and besides, why shoot someone when "picture caking" is a more viable and tasty option?

"picture caking" is a fun and edible form of personal score-settling that i invented with a little inspiration from my partner in crime, miss fanya cohen. the popular ice cream establishment baskin robbins has the technology to scan any picture you so desire on to the top layer of an ice cream cake. one fine summer day, about two or so years ago, fanya happened to be pissing me off as we passed the store front of baskin robbins and i exclaimed that if fanya did not stop vexing me, i'd be left with no choice but to "picture cake [her], and stab [her], and EAT [her]!". needless to say, fanya found this particular outburst of hostility in dessert form to be quite amusing. for the next year and a half, we kept up the picture cake inside joke. finally, not content to simply mutter idle picture cake threats anymore, fanya and i decided it was time for less talk and a bit more action on that front. not finding anyone we hated suitably enough to maim in effigy in real life, we settled on a big glossy picture of mary kate and ashley olsen. no outrageous garden tool was overlooked for use in the destruction of our frozen confection. in the end, i think a crowbar, hedge clippers, and a sledgehammer were part of our arsenal. and we've got a whole roll of pictures to prove it.

so, let that be a lesson to all those out there who dare to incur the wrath of briana. yeah, you don't want to fuck with this bitch, i be *craaaazy*.

5.) Five-year plans are ridiculous, but we all dream. In your dreams, where are you and what are you doing ten years down the road. (note: don't be snide, answer this seriously -ed).

honestly, i have no idea what i'd like to be doing in ten years, other than maybe jude law or luke wilson or ewan mcgregor or [insert name of dreamy screen idol here]. but, i know you said to be serious, so i'll try to answer again.

right now i'm at an icky transitional phase of some sort, and i don't feel that a) i'm particularly well-suited to do anything i am interested in, and b) anything i might wind up doing will provide for me the way i am accustomed to. it's not a very sunny picture.

if i could act or be involved in entertainment in some way, i'd like that, but janeane garafalo already exists, and she's doing a better job of being me than i am. i toy around with the idea of being a writer, but that's about as unstable as anne heche's sexuality as well. i'm hoping someone out there will see me doing something creative and just hire me to do something so i won't have to make the unsavory life-decision myself.

as for a family and babies, well, i can't say that i'm completely opposed to the idea, but seeing as my longest actual "relationship" to date has been three months and occurred during high school, i'm woefully inexperienced in that department. any talk on my part of romance or couplehood, at the moment, is pure conjecture. right now i'm just looking forward to the one day when i'll truly fall in love and have that love returned. anything else i'll consider a bonus.

jesus, is that serious enough for you, dave?! i have to go take my mood-elevating drugs now...